Category Archives: tears and rain

this is exactly the kind of romantic comedy i need to manage my own totally unromantic and very confusing life – bring it on!

some days should immediately after they cease be erased from memory or, even better, started anew with a chance of not being as horrible as they were – this has been such a day – i don’t want to go into detail, but i feel like a mess at the moment and things just won’t get better, too much nastiness for one day – let’s just hope, tomorrow will be as good as today was bad – and this is for all the beastliness of today, go and f*** yourself

and now, excuse me, while i go and sing along real loud and smash something

melancholy deluxe – being forlorn and lovelorn mixed with happiness nevertheless results in listening to sad music and a delicious feeling of melancholy – it is not altogether bad, but it could be better

rainy days are perfect for doing one’s taxes, cleaning the apartment, reading a good book, writing a story – or for staring randomly into space, sleeping and dosing for a couple of hours, drinking hot chocolate and generally being melancholic – i chose the latter and am now confronted with a choice of getting out of my nightie and comfortable pink polka-dot robe to go out shopping and maybe taking my mind of things or snuggle up under the blankets, hot waterbottle and a cheesy movie – tough call, really – perhaps, shopping for more chocolate, chips and puddings first, then snuggling up? – that would also give me a chance to put on my wellies and splash through the rain …

what the f*** – seriously, you let the unicorns die out? – how could you? – as of an old legend, i am waiting for my prince on his white unicorn and now he’ll never show – that’s just mean and ugly and hateful – i don’t like you anymore

p.s. more of this:

unsuspecting and rather expecting a pleasant day, i made my way to the library this morning – as it turns out, the day was to begin wonderfully and exciting and continue disastrously – does the name halliwell sutcliffe ring a bell? no? no matter – i had no idea who he was either, mistaking him for a critic or a long-dead brontë-freak, who published a few articles, maybe worth mentioning, possibly quoting, nothing more – i was in for a shock – that man has written more than 30 novels, short-stories and a bunch of poems, but his works aren’t really published anymore – still, at least twelve novels apparently deal with the idea of haworth and the moors as settings for romantic fiction and in 1915 the people in haworth called him “the great yorkshire author” – oh my, who was that guy – not even wikipedia could help and his books are scarce in the libraries, out of print in the stores and if you dare search a biography, also dear to be disappointed – nothing, nowhere to be found

my heart freakishly stopped and my soon-to-be finished first chapter vanished into a mist of meaningless nothings – i’d have to do it all over again: the reasearch, the thinking, the putting together, the writing – o dear horror! – no way, i am doing that – i’ll do my best to look into it and then leave him behind – sutcliffe, you can remain a mystery to me, for all i care – i should never mention you again, if not for that satisfactory sense of completeness, which follows a closed up and finished bit of work and which wouldn’t be there, if i omitted your puzzling existence and forgotten works

so, i refuse to be scared into a panic for the long run, continue onwards just as before and acknowledge a little room for you somewhere – otherwise, loud music, chocolate and a girl’s night in will be all that is needed to restore the perky, sassy me of this morning

unfortunately alohomora does not work without a magic wand and mine was hidden inside my apartment alongside my keys last night – i was locked out – not all that bad usually, considering i keep a key with my friend and neighbour – but, also unfortunately, this key was also inside my apartment because i’ve had friends visiting some weeks ago and haven’t yet gotton around to giving the key back – my landlord didn’t answer his phone and i left frantic messages on his  answering machine – then i spent about 2 hours with two lovely friends trying to break into my own apartment

not only did that not work, but also – very disturbing indeed – none of my neighbours came out to check if everything was alright and no one was breaking in for real – anyways, i spent the night at a friend’s place, debating my options – call a locksmith in the morning and pay a lot of money or wait for my landlord to come back home – luckily he called this morning and let me back into my apartment, which i swear, i will not leave for the next 24 hours!

i was looking for doris day’s version of perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, when i came across this – and it is just too adorable to pass by, so doris day will have to wait – and really, it does not matter, which version i post because the essence is the same – the song fits the situation – i like the song, not the situation, but try and be patient and cope – somehow i lack concentration and don’t get anything done today – maybe i’ll simply go back to bed – seems like a good option to me and then i can wake up and time has passed and distraction arrives – oh, just on a side-note, i had an intern all to myself this morning – to delegate work to and be nice to me – that is an excellent distraction – i need my own business and many, many interns!

but now for the music and the adorable cuteness – that accent, that voice, those smiling eyes – girl’s in about ten years beware!

you’ll be missed