Category Archives: help wanted

so, who’s stopping by with my cupcakes and music to soothe my womb

makes me very unhappy – my beloved notebook was infested with a nasty little trojan – i have hopefully removed it now, but it thaught me to never be too sure, since it was very well hidden and only my uncle’s sound advise has helped me to find and get rid of it – so, thanks for that and keep well, dear aura sandino ;)

why have i never heard of rocky m. before? and who is he? and why is there no way to find out – not even via wikipedia? – do you know, who he is? – anywas, great song, very catchy

next, not music in a strictly speaking sense, but very musical to me and very dearly loved – the minster bells of york

bed & breakfast – a british institution – but finding the perfect one in the perfect place is not quite  as simple as imagined – i want to go to the yorkshire dales for a couple of nights, so i tried finding the perfect place first – having finally settled on aysgarth, i am now in the process of securing lodgins – it seems impossible, just as well as public transportation in this country is a nightmare  – it’s perfect, once you’re on the right bus or train, but finding the right one, choosing the perfect rate, locating it’s destinated place of departure is very confusing indeed – i keep on cross-referencing with several timetables in paper and on the internet – and yet, i still made a serious miss-booking just this morning – i’ll be leaving haworth around lunch time, get to york in the early afternoon to catch a train to thirsk – but the cheapes off-peak one doesn’t leave till later that night – bah, could have spent more time in haworth and saved £ 5, instead get to hurry out of haworth and linger some more in york or spend more money – tough decision – but enough for today – 2 hours of this and my head’s a mess and i keep on thinking in circles:

‘what if i catch the 9:22 out of york, that’ll get me to malton, but no, then i’ll just have missed the 10:34 on to pickering. the next one isn’t till 11:56. is malton nice? and then i won’t get to pickering until 15:43 and by that time i’ll not be able to catch a train that day. but the 6:24 will get me to pickering directly, then i’ll just have to wait for 4 hours for the train. hm, is pickering nice? oh, damn, that bus is only listed on the internet, not on the bus guide. what does that mean? i won’t get there at all?’

i am sure there’s a way and people get to pickering in time, it’s just nothing that can be looked up anywhere – one of these things, british people just know – and i am equally sure, i’ll eventually find my way – it’s just very discomforting to plan for hours and then have the feeling of having achieved nothing of great value, just a mis-booked train ticket, which cannot be exchanged without paying wbout double the amount you paid for the ticket in the first place

and here’s to all the bed & breakfasts in the world – may you prosper and keep on confusing people

there must be a mail-order service for depression, where i unconsciously keep on ordering bucket-loads full of depressive news – there is just no end to the things that keep on popping up and making already troublesome days almost unbearable – there is sickness, death and war where ever i look – personal and public

i think it is about time for a counterstrike – i officially announce my new business – antidepressants by the busload – you can order the following packages:

  • 3-Day, recommended for minor depressive attacks caused by minor accidents and incidents, such as a tear in your favourite dress, breaking your grandma’s inheritance china or failing an exam – this package will include 3 days worth of funny clips, cartoons and messages, a bar of finest chocolate  and some nice sad songs to wallow in your misery
  • 5-Day, recommended for medium depressions, short-term hear-sickness and overly long and gray winter weeks – this package will include 5 days worth of funny clips, cartoons and messages, a fine box of chocolates, a recommendation for a good cheesy movie  and some nice sad songs to wallow in your misery
  • 10-Day, recommended for hard-core bouts of depression, recurring bad news and unbearable pain – this package will include 10 days worth of funny clips, cartoons and messages, a tin of your favourite ben&jerrys ice-cream, a whole long list of movie recommendations for long and lonley nights, where a tissue box is your only friend, and – of course – some nice sad songs to wallow in your misery

orders to be put in via comment – add your e-mail adress and the date you wish the “treat”-ment to start – happy antidepressant days!

leighton meester on her new song

it is definitely about what’s going on in my life and i think anybody can relate. you’re crazy, you’re busy, you’re young and you’re running around and it’s really hard to find somebody to love. people love you but you don’t really love them.

i can definitely relate – jet-set girl that i am, i find it very hard to find somebody to love – new york, san francisco, london, berlin – i am just too busy hopping on planes or trains and being fabulous – there’s simply no time for love, so i keep on falling for impossible men – it’s some kind of self-protection against being hurt by being left behind or leaving – only one overly large flaw, it desperately hurts to be love sick in the first place, to long after someone that can never be yours and be totally lovelorn* and full of lover’s grief
got my back against the wall
wonder where i’ll be tomorrow?

so very true, i really wonder where life will take me next

* i just learned that word today and i really like it – lovelorn, oh yes, that is how i feel at the moment

… i am an enchanted scholarship – to me it seems like all scholarships are enchanted and especially so i won’t understand how to dechant them – kissing? who? and when? and where? and how long? – doing a phd seemed so easy, but needing money to support myself and my not even extravagant life-style is a drag, so a scholarship is inevitable – it’s just a question of enduring


i agree, every girl needs a gay best friend, but i think i’d have left then and there – who cares if this is paradise

it’s fashion week in berlin – it’s session week at the bundestag in berlin – but it’s also chaos week in my life – where to start? – between my mom going missing, work being simply to crazy for words and the abso-fuckin’-lutely hot weather, it’s hard to chose

so, let’s make a list of all the crazy, bad things that happened to me this week and then you can judge for yourself, wether i was jinxed or what’s been going on

  1. crazy work
  2. my mom going missing
  3. hot, hot, hot
  4. an in the middle of it all i find myself dancing in the rain
  5. chaos with berlin s-bahn
  6. train chaos – sudden track change 3 minutes before train’s supposed to leave – a man with a heart-attack, then going fast, fast, faster – hang on, slow, slow, slower? – that’s not right! – a broken engine (had to go to priort – where the f*** is priort? – to switch to the other engine) – then, after already 40 minutes delay, we stopped for a regio train of all things – crazy world
  7. my cell phone display is broken – i can still call people, but only those, whose number i know by heart – no, it really was lucky i kept my old cell phone and i was home in göttingen for the weekend
  8. a bird dropped it’s shit on me
  9. somehow i managed to be at the train station an hour early – stupid me, completely unnecessary – i could have added an extra hour of afternoon nap

well, so far for all the major things that have happend, but as the week draws to it’s close, luck seems to change – i did get all my tube connections in berlin without having to wait one minute (something that never ever ever occured to me before anywhere int he world) – so i take this as a sign that luck indeed changed and that a week of chaos is followed by a week of luck and perfect happiness – i shall let myself be surprised by all the wonderful things that are sure to happen